Dear Clara

Dear Clara,

For a long time, I hung out with a group of friends who I thought I knew pretty well.  We were big gang of partygoers and oftentimes I would be the leader of the pack.  Things were great for a while. But just this week, they’ve have changed.  My one-time friends now reject me. They say I’m not the party guy they thought I was and now, it seems, they’ve found someone new.  What should I do?

Mo-Jo from Connecticut

Dear Mo-Jo,

These things happen.  You really have three choices.  One is to try to get back into the good graces of your old friends.  This would involve apologizing and pretending to be more like them -- even when that’s not the way you really feel.  I suspect from your letter that this just isn’t your style. Another possibility is to find a new gang of party-goers with whom you are more comfortable.  Sometimes this is hard because the new group may have a hard time accepting you.  After all, for a long time you were part of someone else’s gang! So if that doesn’t work, you may want to give up party-going altogether. You may find, to your surprise, that parties aren't as popular as they once were and there are a lot of people who would just as soon stay home. These could well become your new best friends.

Dear Clara,

A few nights ago, I was out in a club drinking seltzer water when a bartender called Bernstein secretly added grain alcohol to my drink.  Feeling woozy -- although certainly with no idea why! -- I left and the valet, a fellow by the name of Schwartz, brought up my car.  Unknown to me, he had jiggered with the accelerator. The result was that I ended up speeding and an Officer Rosenberg and his partner Officer Shulman pulled me over. They brought me in to the police station where a Doctor Cohen pretended to administer a Breathalyzer test.  Little did I know, but he falsified the results, using readings from a drunk named Levy who had been brought in earlier in the day. In any event, I got upset.  Do you think I was within my rights?

Mad Max

Dear Max,

What a heavy cross you must bear! The whole thing sounds staged, making you the victim of a conspiracy by rabble-rousers who seem out to get you. You, of course, won’t be the first person undeservedly crucified -- but I’m sure you already know that. Your enemies probably think you’re dead as a result of this trumped-up incident but here’s hoping that, in three days or so, you can push aside this legal boulder and rise above it all.

Dear Clara,

We recently did some redecorating and installed some attractive drop-panel ceilings. Most of our guests -- and we’ve had plenty! -- have been delighted with the look of things.  But then one of the ceiling panels fell and now everyone is saying they no longer want to visit.  What should we do?

Massachusetts Mitt and Matt

Dear MMM,

Well, now I guess we know why they called them “drop-panel”!! Seriously, I wouldn’t worry about this too much.  Memories fade quickly -- indeed, I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t find your guests returning already, in greater numbers than ever. You might want to take a look at the other ceiling panels, however. Fixing them shouldn’t be hard -- as long as you’re willing to spend a few dollars more. Perhaps you can persuade your many guests to contribute.