Daddy, tell me the story about Boston before global warming.
You’ve heard this one before, honey.
But I like it — the streets. . .
Yes, the streets. It once was that all of Boston’s streets were just packed with throngs of cars, rushing here and there, sometimes hitting, hurting, and even killing people who were just out for a simple walk.
No canals?
That’s right, no canals at all. Your Uncle Fred, the gondolier? Before the canals were built, there were no jobs for people like him. You wouldn’t see the water by your side as you strolled around, just a lot of smelly cars.
It sounds awful.
It was. Funny, but we didn’t know it. We just accepted it the way it was. You know the Harborwalk? Now it’s raised, and it seems we can see a million miles. Back then, it was right at sea level. And the winters were so cold and snowy that sometimes we couldn’t even leave the house.
Is that why all the Canadians come here to visit?
Absolutely. They love the warm weather and all of our beaches. Used to be that they’d all go to the North Shore or Cape Cod.
Cape what?
Never mind. It’s not around anymore. But who cares? We’ve got beaches everywhere now. Even Framingham and Worcester.
We’re so lucky for global warming.
Indeed we are, honey. Indeed we are.
Mommy, tell about what it was like before the Olympics.
Well, dear, many years ago we didn’t have a media center, a soccer stadium, the athletes’ village, the special lanes for Olympic officials, and all of the 25 or so sports venues we have now.
What was there instead?
People, honey. People actually lived in downtown Boston.
But I thought people were supposed to live in suburbs.
Right. But no one seemed to understand that. Then, luckily, the opportunity came along for Boston to host the 2024 Olympics. Many people said no, but some really smart developers thought otherwise and got to work. They tore down all of the nasty apartments and spent billions building the shiny new buildings the Olympics folks said we should have.
Is that why you have to pay that special tax each year?
Yes, but I’m not complaining. It was worth it. For one summer, Boston was the most important city on the planet. It was sad, of course, that all of those businesses had to move out, but I wouldn’t trade that memory for anything.
And we got all of those lovely, empty places to play!
That’s right.
We’re so lucky we have developers, aren’t we?
Indeed we are, dear, indeed we are.
Daddy, tell me the story about Brave Bill.
Well, sweetie, once upon a time people used to make fun of the Boston City Council. They said it didn’t do much, had no power, and was worthless. They just treated it terribly.
And what did Brave Bill do?
Bill said that wasn’t true. He helped people understand that city councilors were the city’s real heroes, the leaders who made Boston the great place it was. He told people how long and hard they worked and how deeply they cared.
So people said, ‘Give them more money’?
I wish. Crabby citizens, media writers, and even the mayor of Boston — Mean Marty, they called him — all tried to stop Brave Bill.
But he won, right?
Yes, he did. Brave Bill helped the city councilors get more money. Soon after that, though, the councilors realized they still weren’t getting paid enough for all of the good things they were doing, so Brave Bill got them even more. And since Brave Bill had a supermajority. . .
Supermajority?
Yes. It means enough votes that there was nothing Mean Marty could do to stop them. And that’s why today there’s a law that city councilors have to be paid the most of anyone in the city.
More than video stars?
Of course. They’re worth every penny — and maybe even more.
We’re so lucky Brave Bill was around, aren’t we?
Indeed we are, sweetie, indeed we are.
This column was first published in The Boston Globe on October 14, 2014.